This is a true story.
 
When I was young, I attended a Jethro Tull concert at Madison Square Garden in New York City. It was a rowdy crowd of mostly twenty-somethings. And the show was running late.
 
Finally the lights came down, the crowd cheered, an announcer mumbled an unintelligible introduction over the house public address system, a spotlight hit the stage, and out walked . . . Livingston Taylor. 
 
Poor Liv.  He was the unadvertised opening act for Jethro Tull. He stood on stage with his guitar and started singing a song. The impatient crowd didn’t want this unpleasant surprise; they wanted Jethro Tull. Now. They started booing. Livingston Taylor pressed on and the booing got louder and louder.
 
Liv stopped in mid-song, mumbled something in disgust and walked off the stage. The crowd cheered. The house lights went up and the audience sat for another 45 minutes . . . waiting. It was clear that Jethro Tull wasn’t going to reward this display of rudeness. They had the crowd continue to wait for what would have been the duration of Livingston Taylor’s performance.
 
Finally, the house lights came down again. What would Jethro Tull do, particularly Ian Anderson, the band’s leader? How would they open their show? Would they respond to how the audience treated Livingston Taylor or just launch their show as if nothing had happened?
 
Ian Anderson didn’t disappoint. He walked alone into the spotlight with just his guitar and sang what was clearly not the planned opening number. He sang Wond’ring Aloud, a very short, minor song off his Aqualung album. The crowd cheered, to the point of almost drowning him out. But they quieted down enough to clearly hear the final lyrics of that song – which was Ian Anderson’s message to the audience:
 
“And it's only the giving
That makes you what you are”
  
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I was reminded of this event while scanning political posts and comments on social media before the tryptophan took hold after a big turkey dinner. I was dismayed by how mean, nasty, rude, snarky and downright hateful many of them were – especially on Thanksgiving.
 
There has always been and will always be people who behave badly. But what stood out was how this coarsening of the public discourse is being adopted and proliferated by elected officials and political organizations that profess to hold a principled and moral high ground. It’s no longer about making an intelligent argument for one’s viewpoint – it’s about insulting, demonizing and hurting anyone who disagrees with you.
 
The last thing we need, especially in local politics, are people in power and influential organizations who legitimize and normalize uncivil behavior. It is never appropriate to advocate and celebrate counter-punching one’s fellow citizens, especially when they are your constituents.
  
To paraphrase Ian Anderson, you are what you give.     
 
On this Thanksgiving holiday, here’s hoping we give kindness and respect to each other, even when we disagree.